Day after Christmas

I woke up not feeling my best. Tim said I snored all night which was why I thought my throat was hurting. I rested and stayed in pjs the day before. So, I was ready to get up and get dressed. I was going to take some of my own advice. I posted on facebook the other day an Exercise Tip: To not leave your bedroom until you were dressed with tennis shoes on then head out the door. I had the great idea I would be heading out for a quick walk. Little did I realize that would not happen. A pair of work out pants was replaced bya new pair of warm pink snow man pants . My throat was hurting for more reasons than snoring. One of my most favorite pieces of clothing are fuzzy socks. So, I found a pair and put them on before getting back into bed. I was then pleasantly suprised by my husband bringing me breakfast in bed. Yes, I am one blessed woman. I am married to my own handsome personal chef. That is just one of many perks. lol

These days are rare in my life so I embraced it. I left the tv off all day until time for Fear Factor. Then I had two little snuggle bunnies by my side. Just 2 weeks ago my father in law, Pops went to be with Jesus. The crazy thing is Fear Factor was a rerun. The same episode was on the night of Pops passing. It brought back many memories from that night. Tim and I packed bags to stay with his parents as long as we needed to. We really expected Pops to live at least a week longer. Joyce was laying by his side every night. She slept on the floor until we brought her an air mattress. She layed with her head at his feet. She shared later it was so she could look into his face. That statement really impacted me and just to observe how Joyce sat by Pops side, really touched my heart.  That is just a side note and probably another blog.

So, I just happened to look in the room and didn't see Joyce. So, I decided to see what was going on. Wow, didn't expect to see Pops laying there gasping for air. So, I immediately motioned for Tim. I was trying to be somewhat discreet not wanting to disturb our upset our children. One minute we were laughing and watching Fear Factor next minute we were watching Pops struggle to breath. Joyce was standing by his head rubbing it and Tim was holding his hand. We knew this was it, Pops was dying. I was touching Pops leg and praying while standing by my husband's side. It was an emotional night. I was crying uncontrollably. I knew any minute Pops would stop breathing. The tears continued to roll then I had a great urgency for Chirstian music. I asked Joyce, where is a radio. We need music, she wasn't really hearing me. I turned the tv channel looking for some Christian music. The only thing I could find was Jesse Duplantis on TBN. He was preaching on favor. Joyce said they both listened to him so I could leave it on. Then I started singing Amazing Grace. Well, I attempted to sing it because I couldn't really remember the words. I then started humming it. The tears continued to roll down my face. Then I started singing Jesus loves the Little Children. I told Pops Jesus loves you. I knew if Pops could speak he would tell me to stop singing. It was a humorous thing after the fact.

I was so touched to watch my husband give honor to his Dad. He told his Dad that he was proud of him. He told him that he loved him. He gave him 2 big hugs. One while he was still alive and one after he died. I told Pops that we were going to be sad when he was gone but we tired of seeing him suffer and it was ok if he was ready to go. We had such great comfort knowing he would spend eternity in Heaven with Jesus. It still was hard to not have Pops with us. Oh, I did tell Pops that he was leaving behind a legacy. That Seth would carry on the Garner last name and legacy. Tim and I looked at the clock and it was 8:49pm when Pops took his last breathe.

I didn't even intend in share all that but it just rolled so I knew it must be God. I was going to share my day in silence. I realize that most of us usually have somekind of noise in the background and I want to ask you "Why?" Why do we leave the tv and the radio on? Why don't we like the sound of good ole silence? What are we scared of, what are we afraid we might hear? I personally have grown to love silence. I used to think that I had to always be talking. Even when spending time with God. I have recently gained a revelation of power in the peace. Peace meaning peace and quiet. Are we scared of our own thoughts and mind? I read a great book, Power of Positive Thinking" by Norman Vincent Peale. He said that we should spend 15 mins every day sitting in silence. It recharges our battery and brings power to our life. When I was sitting in my bed, that book came to mind. I was thinking I could for sure use some power not feeling so great. I was thinking I can do this. I looked at my clock with the idea I was going to spend 15 mins in silence. I am hear to tell you didn't work! It seemed like work so I lost track of time and the idea of making it 15 mins. I ended up actually spending several hours in my room all alone. It was glorious!

I think I have typed a big eyeful so I will close with this thought. What are you afraid of?  Luke 5:10-11 says Jesus said to Simon, There is nothing to fear. From now on you'll be fishing for men and women. They pulled their boats up on the beach, left them, nets and all, and followed him.

I have to share this part. That was The Message translation which I've never read before. The women part really got my attention. God has put a mandate on my life to help as many women as possible realize their worth and value and dream God dreams.  So, my heart is for the women to know and experience the Love of God. so, my spirit was stirred up.  I feel honored to be used by Him and have you as a friend. :)